Should You Stop Dating After a Divorce?
“I’m divorced. Nobody wants me. I’m 55, wrinkly, old, and alone. Do I still have a chance at dating?”
Everybody has a chance at anything, and dating is no exception. Divorce is merely a phase. It’s rough, but zoom out an it’s merely a blip in your timeline.
Sure, you no longer have the same swagger from 30 years ago, but times are changing.
You might think you’ve lost your charm because you’ve been out of the dating scene longer than you’d hoped to be. Things may be a bit different now that you’ve grown older, and that might seem scary. But that’s okay because I’m here to show you why you’re never too old to date, even after a divorce.
These are reasons to remind you that dating isn’t so bad after a divorce.
- Finding a date is now easier. Remember the olden days when you had to go out and mingle to have a shot at finding someone to take out on a date? You’ve grown older, yes. And you might find the same routine harder at your age, but technology has made dating simpler.
Enter online dating. Finding like-minded people is now as easy as the click of a button. And depending on the app or website, you can set preferences and filters so you can be sure that the woman who sent you a message request is open to dating someone your age. You can get to know each other online and meet in person when you are both ready.
- You are more mature. Your perspective on life has changed for the better. You no longer think about short-term happiness. Instead, you yearn for meaningful long-term connections. And with your experience with divorce, you are now more mindful of how you treat those connections.
- Divorce is now more common. Divorce is no longer a mistake. It has become a widely accepted fact of marriage that thousands of couples go through every year. Don’t get me wrong. I’m not saying everyone should get a divorce, but I won’t deny the fact that thanks to divorce, men and women are getting a chance to break free from unfulfilling and toxic marriages and are given another shot at finding the right partner.
- You are more experienced. You are no longer the naive boy who used to chase waterfalls. You are now wiser and more experienced with life and relationships, so you make fewer mistakes as you’ve learned from your past experiences. Wisdom is the new handsome.
Get back your swagger.
Getting back to the dating scene isn’t just about changing your mindset about dating after divorce — it’s a step-by-step process. Once you feel more comfortable with the idea of going at it again, you need to learn how to get back your swagger and make another woman fall for you. Having a “map” to guide you will make your return to dating more forgiving.
If you’ve been married for decades,you’ve probably forgotten how to talk to a lady, much less impress her. Admit it, once you got married, impressing your wife became more of an option than a routine.
If this was you, then that was your first mistake. Even after marriage, you should always find time to woo your wife. Not only does it assure her that your feelings for her haven’t changed, but it also ensures your skills with women won’t dull.
If you’ve recently been on dates, think back on them and ask yourself where you could do better. Were you too serious? Were you being a little too funny? Identify weak points in your approach and improve on them.
If you’re having problems carrying a conversation, don’t feel pressured to come up with witty pickup lines. Make lighthearted conversations to create a casual environment. Talk about topics you are familiar with rather than trying to impress her with awesome things you’ve never done before. You’ll be surprised at how seamless your conversations will be.
And more importantly, do not talk about negative experiences, especially if they are about your divorce or your ex. Instead, talk about your hobbies, ask her questions, and maybe tell her about your plans for the weekend. If your plans pique her interest, you can always ask her if she would like to accompany you.
Easy, right? So if you’ve been divorced and you’re having doubts about dating again, don’t! Be open to creating new connections and meeting new people. Let this guide kickstart your dating game so you can get back to finding the right person for you. Don’t let divorce get in the way of your happiness.
